fileg (fileg) wrote,

being gang-saved at home / and happy harvest

A few of weeks ago, just post election, the doorbell rang at some (for me) outrageously early hour, and because Jim and I have ordered yulies from overseas, I leaped up and performed my version of running to the door while pulling my terrycloth nightshirt/robe thing on. I expected my regular mailman, who knows it takes me a moment to relocate myself on Earth Prime, and laughs at me if my robe thing is inside out. Or my regular, favorite UPS guy (happily back on my route) with boxes that say WETA all over them.

But, it was a brace of Jehova's Witnesses. I blinked sleepily at them, looked repeatedly at their hands to see if they had packages for me, and finally caught on.

They told me that people everywhere were watching with interest as hurricanes and volcanos and other, more seditious plagues appeared on the landscape. But, did I know the bible had predicted these things?

"Yes," I replied. I did not add that my first twelve years of schooling were parochial school, that I have been interested in comparative religion and mythology all my life, with a side order of the occult, or that it seemed a bloody stupid thing to tell me it looked like the endtimes just days after the elections. I did not add that Edgar Cayce had talked about them too, but I wasn't thinking of including him in my personal spiritual makeup, or that both Cayce and the Bible had neglected to mention the Red Sox.

They asked to come in, and I told them I work at night, and that in these troubled times, no matter how well meaning people seem, I have a habit of not inviting strangers into my living room.

They peered into my living room and, apparently deciding I was at a loss for reading material, they asked if they could leave me some pamphlets. I have a slight allergy to newsprint, and a horror of trees being turned into solicitation material when you could be handing out a url, but I was raised to be polite, and I thanked them and they went away. I shredded the tracts into the recycling bin and, pleased that I had not let my temper wake me up when there was no reason to be rude, I went back to bed.

Yesterday, after receiving lots of email about tracking notices for packages, I had a series of early buzzes. Some presents jim ordered from Japan, and ten minutes later another box the DHL man found still in the truck. Something I ordered for Chris from, followed by a different truck with a weta package for jim. Followed by the Jehova's Witnesses.

The woman I had spoken to before blinked at my robe (It's my favorite robe, and it doesn't raise any eyebrows at the pool in the gym - a simple white spa terry over-the-head with a v neck) as though amazed to find me slugging about at 11 am after going to bed at 6. I blinked and stared back, unable to remember if I had perhaps spoken to them in something like Sindarin last time. They asked outright to come in this time, and once again I managed not to say thanks, but if I wanted people to know what I have in the house in the way of electronics, I would post them on the internet.... (ummm, maybe not the best example, but I was really sleepy). I mentioned again that I sleep in the daytime, and they nodded. I decided to harmlessly fib that my husband would not approve of me inviting men in while he was at work, and they nodded more vigorously, saying "Oh!"

But again, they assured me they had been thinking about me specifically, and handed me a new couple of pamphlets, one of which was emblazoned in VJ size headline type, bold extended (appropriately but annoyingly) OBESITY!

So, I blinked at my hand and wondered if they had woken me up to tell me I was fat - you know, in case I had somehow missed it. (and if next time it will say Your Damn Old!) or if they somehow had decided that waking people up to insult them as a reward for not being rude to you was, like, the new black.

I shredded the recycling, and spent a few disoriented moments thinking about the last set that tried to adopt me - until they rang the bell early one Sunday morning and Jim staggered to the door. He was also polite, but they couldn't seem to get away fast enough, and kept shuffling the youngster they had with them back down the walk. Jim came back to the bedroom, shaking his head and telling me he hadn't done anything - as he peeled out of his favorite old Stiff Records t-shirt - the one that says If it ain't Stiff, it aint worth a fuck...

What i really resent about solicitation saving is the idea that I an some sort of godless heathen.

what comes closest to describing me, I guess, would be panthiest. I don't believe in an anthropomorphic god, but I do believe there is a spark of the "divine" in all things. Maybe there is a hand at the rudder beyond that, maybe the combined divinity of all our sparks makes up the greater spirit, I'm not sure.

I believe that if matter cannot be created or destroyed, that spirit is the same or better.

I believe in studying comparative religions, because I am interested in all the things people have discovered on their searches.

I do not believe in organized religions, because I believe that no soul can be told the how or the why - part of the procession of the spirit for me is that you must spend the time discovering for yourself what it is you believe. And because I think that like any organized system that want's to tell you it has the answer, it can be (as so probably will be at various times) abused for less spiritual goals like power and/or self aggrandizement.

So, when I give thanks today, it is for the illuminated life, spirit and heart. And high on my list are the sparks of your shared words, wisdom and welcome.

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